Eejoon Choi / NextGenRadio
home?
Tekella Foster speaks to Deborah Holmes, whose daycare center in a small Mississippi town has provided a home for the parents and children in her community for 24 years.
‘We are the safe place’: A daycare center and a Mississippi community
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(SOUNDBITE OF DEBORAH HOLMES TALKING TO CHILDREN): Alright. Ready? Give me a kiss. Did you catch it? Put it in your pocket.
DEBORAH HOLMES: I am Deborah Goss Holmes. I was born and raised in Louisville, Mississippi. I am a licensed minister. I am the owner of Destiney’s Daycare Center. I am a community worker. That’s basically who I am.
(SOUNDBITE OF HOLMES TALKING TO CHILDREN): How was your day? Good!
HOLMES: Home means to me … it’s not the four walls, what the average person would call home … my home is the whole community. That’s where my home is. And wherever I go, that’s home to me.
Destiney’s Daycare came to be … my first granddaughter was born and we named her Destiney. And I was one of those grandmoms really not knowing what to really do, and then really – to be truthful – didn’t want no one keeping my grandbaby. So what I did, I opened up the daycare center and we named it Destiney. And that was September 15, 1999.
I opened up being selfish. I didn’t want no one to take care of my baby. But when I saw the need of the community, I incorporated it all together so it worked out.
(SOUNDBITE OF HOLMES TALKING TO CHILDREN AND BLOWING KISSES): K is for kiss! K is for kiss. Hey Leo!
HOLMES: Our typical day starts at 5:45, that’s a.m.
And we have a school age group that will come in between 2:45. So I try to greet each one with a hug and ask them how was their day? Because they have so much they want to talk about.
(SOUNDBITE OF HOLMES TALKING TO CHILDREN): How was your day? Your day was good?
The people that come through a Destiney’s Daycare Center? They are single parents. They are teen parents. We have even foster parents that come through our center. We have parents that come through who are just really needing help.
I am a rescuer. I rescue people from their hurts. I tries to (cries) because every child, every person is important. And if I can help make someone dream come true, whether he’s a child or whether it’s the parent, I wanna help make that dream come true.
(SOUNDBITE OF CHILDREN SAYING GRACE): God is great, God is good, let us thank him for our food.
HOLMES: I love my job. I started taking care of children at 12 years, and that’s because my dad deserted us, and my mom had to get a job to take care of us. So my brother and myself, we had to be the miniature mom and the miniature dad to take care of our sibling.
(SOUNDBITE OF INDISTINCT CHATTER)
HOLMES: Destiney’s Daycare is basically a home away from home, a safe home away from home.
This makes me happy. It keeps me young. It keeps me on my toes. I love taking care of children because they are not only the children of the future, they are the children of now. These are the ones … If I had a mold and put something good in them, put love in them, they’re going to take care of the people that they are assigned to. So, yes, I love my job.
(SOUNDBITE OF CHILDREN GIGGLING)
On a recent Monday in Louisville, Mississippi, all eyes were on Deborah Holmes as she walked into a classroom at Destiney’s Daycare and threw playful air kisses from her palm into dozens of tiny hands.
“Give me a kiss!” she shouted to the classroom. “Did you catch it? Put it in your pocket.”
Moments like this are common for Holmes, 67, who’s been running the daycare for almost a quarter of a century, where thousands of children from her community and their parents have come and gone.
“We are the safe place for [each parent’s] child, because we don’t want children keeping children. We don’t want parents leaving their children at home.”
Holmes wears many hats as a wife, mother, grandmother, former foster parent, licensed minister and community leader. What also keeps her going is Destiney’s Daycare, the facility she founded in September 1999 after her teenage son became the father of her first grandchild, the daycare’s namesake.
Deborah Holmes leans over to kiss a toddler in her daycare. May 1, 2023.
TEKELLA FOSTER / NEXTGENRADIO
Portrait of Deborah Holmes stands in front of her classrooms. May 1, 2023.
TEKELLA FOSTER / NEXTGENRADIO
Children say grace before snack time. May 1, 2023.
TEKELLA FOSTER / NEXTGENRADIO
She confesses she “selfishly” didn’t want anyone else watching her granddaughter, Destiney, so she created the childcare business, but she quickly realized it served a bigger need in her community. Today, as in its early days, the daycare center supports families that include teenage parents, low-income parents, foster parents and nontraditional students.
Avery Lane (left) Royal Huges(right) are seated at a table during snack time. May 1, 2023.
TEKELLA FOSTER / NEXTGENRADIO
Like one of her daycare parents, a mother of four in her mid-20s, who wanted to drop out of nursing school.
“I would tell her, ‘Don’t tell me that you can’t do it. What’s your reason not to do it? Your child is safe. All you have to do is go to school, do your work. Your children are OK.’”
When someone says, “I can’t do it,” Holmes has zero tolerance for excuses.
“You tell me what you can do,” she said. “And we’re going to work on what you think you can’t do. So I don’t play around with no one talking about how they can’t do certain things.”
Holmes says that the mother of four did go on to complete her nursing degree.
Because of the role Destiney’s Daycare has come to play in the life of Louisville, Holmes says the community and the daycare go hand in hand. She says the whole community is her home.
“Home to me is going outside of the four walls. I try to meet people where they are,” she said.
The daycare has become a pillar in the community during trying times, too. When Hurricane Katrina hit Mississippi in 2005, Holmes opened her daycare to people who were displaced.
“I am a rescuer,” she said. “I rescue people from their hurts.”
Deborah Holmes throws kisses at students in her classroom. May 1, 2023.
TEKELLA FOSTER / NEXTGENRADIO
Deborah Holmes hugs a student. May 1, 2023.
TEKELLA FOSTER / NEXTGENRADIO
Holmes says her love for others stretches beyond her biological or immediate family, to those who relate to her as if she were a member of their own families, including one six-year-old from the daycare center who lost her grandmother.
“She came in one day and told me, ‘My grandma died.’ I said, ‘Oh, I am so sorry. You know what? I can kind of be your other grandma.’”
Holmes says the little girl has been calling her Grandma ever since.
This community care work makes Holmes happy, and her compassion for people, as they are now and as they will be someday, defines who she is.
“I love taking care of children because they are not only the children of the future, they are the children of now,” she said. “If I had a mold and put something good in them, put love in them, they’re going to take care of the people that they are assigned to.”